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A true psychic will NOT ask you a lot of general questions during your reading. I will sometimes ask for what I loosely term as "general generalities". What I am looking for is simply general knowledge...like where you live (what state) and that is usually all that I will ask. I do this so that I can "test" the connection so that I know that we are connected. I will never ask you for any specific information!
During the reading, I would appreciate it if you would not offer any specific information. Its hard to do a reading when I am being told everything by the client (I have had this happen and have had to ask folks not to give any further info).
Also for me, I do not need to know any birth dates (I do not do astrology), and do not need to know of your age or any of your subjects UNLESS it comes up during the reading itself. if it does, I will ask.
I prefer to work in either a live chat forum or even in "instant messaging" type of arrangement. But I have been known to also read from a simple email. The connection with the Spirit is what is at stake and not the method of communication between the client and the reader.
If someone that you are consulting with as a psychic starts to ask you questions like, are you married, how many kids do you have, what are their ages, etc this as far as I am concerned is enough to want me to go elsewhere's. This type of "reading" is called "loading the language" and your answers will provide the reading and NOT the Spirit. This is a very serious area of problems and concern for me. I don't like it when fraudulent psychics use "load the language" to try to "read" you through your answers. Let me give you some examples...if you say for example that you are married...now we all know that most families have areas of problems for them: they may be financial (who doesn't have financial worries?), relationship issues (between them and their Significant Others and children), there may be job pressures (again, who doesn't unless you are unemployed). A fraudulent psychic may tell you that you are having problems in your marriage, that you have issues with your children and that you are worried about your job. Now, EVERYONE has these issues to some degree or another. The fraudulent psychic ain't psychic...they have merely reflected your own insecurities and worries back to you! This is not a reading...in any shape way or form! The fraudulent psychic will quickly take credit for any accuracies that they may have hit on. The problem is according to the law of averages, they should have been successful anyway's! This is NOT a reading. A "real" reader will be able to see past these issues and may even be able to explain to you how to get yourself out of your situation. The "real reader" will be able to connect to several alternatives and explain all of them to you allowing you to chose whatever is best for YOU...NOT them. There is a vast difference between "loading the language" and asking "general generalities". The differences should be obvious at this point.
If a psychic tells you that they "have all of the answers" in the world...RUN away, don't walk! In more cases than I care to remember, these folks feel that they can use any information for "power". Some people who are readers like to think that they know "everything" about anything! I dislike these folks as they never respect your own thoughts or feelings. If you come across someone like this who claims to be psychic, be CAUTIOUS! They have what is referred to in the field of psychology as a "Messianic Complex" (that is when THEY think that they can cure every one's problems. They believe that they have whatever Divine truth there is and only THEY possess it). Again, if you come across someone who has this type of mentality RUN, don't walk away!
No self respecting psychic will ever see themselves as a God. I don't...I am merely a human. I only know what I am sometimes able to discern the Spirit by the Grace of God and not through any power of my own. Clients have often given me more credit than I deserve. I remind these kind, loving folks that this "ability" does not come from me, but through me as a gift from God. I believe that for some reason, I am "allowed" to use this ability. That's as far as I am willing to claim any rights to this "ability". I am reminded of a story that is important here about Edgar Cayce. Cayce was a young boy growing up in Hopkinsville, KY and that is where he become aware of his "abilities". Later in his career Cayce allowed himself to be manipulated by some people in order for them to make money. The Spirit was so angry with Cayce that it withdrew from him for about a year. Cayce learned right then and there that he had to do as he was told by the Spirit and not what he decided on his own.
Now, lets talk about the process of the actual reading itself...when we meet (either online or even in email form), I ALWAYS start with a short prayer that I offer on behalf of myself and you for the Spirit (again meaning the Ruach ha Kodesh...the Spirit, the Holy).
In the prayer, I ask for several things:
Permission to connect with the Spirit. (If there is no connection permitted, there is no further steps to proceed to). I have only had one time when the connection was refused and I was unable to read for a person and that was because the person was not yet ready for what they would have received.
That the information be genuine
That the information be pertinent
That the information come through strong and complete
That the information must help you in some way for your life journey.
I also pray for protection in all forms and for all purposes
After the prayer is offered, and the connection is made, I sometimes see a figure (if I am doing a "Crossing Over" type of reading) that is formless and sexless. Within seconds the general size and shape of the person will appear before my eyes.
NOTE: If I am doing a "Crossing Over" type of reading, I will sometimes see what is described as "the residual self image" of the deceased. If the deceased had a distorted self image I may see that self image. This is where I might ask for additional details about the deceased's body shape, type or even weight. I have had cases where the deceased had a distorted self image of his weight and saw himself as being fairly overweight when in actuality he was only 20 pounds overweight. This is where the process of interpretation becomes absolutely essential! We will discuss this in greater detail in the section on "Interpretation".
Once I see the form, I might ask a few questions. I might ask if they were overweight, or if they had a limp, or if they were injured (and perhaps even give you some details). I may ask if their crossing was a quick one or not. I may describe the clothing that they are wearing (this will provide a clue as to the actual identity of the person).
One of my first readings I ever did was for a young woman living near Chicago who wanted to connect with her boyfriends Dad. (I did not know anything about Psychic Ethics at that time). The first thing I saw was that he was badly injured. I asked if his crossing was a fast one (it was). During the early stages of the reading I could feel that he had severe pain in his chest and shortness of breath. Then he blacked out and crossed over. The bottom line during this reading was that he had died of a massive heart attack while driving his semi-truck. I kept sensing something about a small white colored dog who barked a lot who's name started with the letter "R". The client replied that he had a white Chihuahua who name was Ricky who had died some time before her boyfriends Dad's death. At first, I thought I was losing it! . Both the young lady and I were totally blown away by this accuracy of the details. To me, that was a "WOW" moment...
Be certain that if you are going to become a reader, you MUST tell the client everything that you see and experience. In some cases, you might hear, see, or even smell something that will be meaningful to the client. Whatever it is that you are sensing you MUST tell the client. There are at least 2 reasons for this: 1) Your experience will tell the client whether or not what you are being shown is genuine; and 2) if you fail to communicate as much as you have been given, the Spirit may stop working with you (as in Edgar Cayce's case).
Occasionally, I might be shown a symbol that would be important for both the client and the deceased. During a telephone conversation with a client, I was shown a brooch type of pin that had bumblebees on it. I was hesitant to ask the client about it, but I did. It turns out that the client had received such a pin from some loved ones estate (the loved one often called the client a "bumblebee"!) If I ask about an object, please do NOT offer any further details about it unless I ask you for specific information.
Another word of caution...if you are seeking "Crossing Over type of reading for a past lover...you can expect that some important personal details WILL come forward! Especially any embarrassing details! A good example, I was asked for a reading by a lady from Florida about her boy friend. He had died a year or so earlier. As I entered my psychic construct a different man came forth named "Jim". Jim had been another of the lady's paramours. When I described the person I was seeing she confirmed that his name was "Jim" but that they were only friends and never lovers. "Foooey!" I told her, "according to Jim you two were hot and heavy lovers..." After a lot of pause and embarrassment she admitted that "Jim" was right! This just goes to show that when you do a reading you NEVER know who might show up! Btw..the man that the client wanted to connect with came but never spoke up...he allowed "Jim" to come forth.
For a very brief time I toyed with the idea of going "professional" and worked for a type of Psychic online service. I was asked to do a reading for a family who had a uncle who was a multimillionaire. It seems that at the reading of the will, the rich uncle left very little to his family and they wanted to know why. I entered my psychic construct, made a connection with the spirit and asked the man why he didn't leave the family his money. His reply was humorous but authentic "When I was alive, they were only after my money. Now that I am dead, they are still after it. Besides, I never really liked them any ways!!" I relayed that statement to the client who promptly ended the session. Be prepared for the truth! It may not be what you "want" to hear, but it may be necessary for you to hear it!
A word about mental illness and Crossing Over: I have had cases where people who were mentally ill had Crossed Over. The cause of the death is not important. After they had arrived on "The Other Side" (as Sylvia Browne calls it), they were put into a deep sleep and were kept sleeping until their mental illness was "cured". I had an Aunt (who suffered from chronic mental illness as a result of WWII living in Holland) she died suddenly from cancer. After she arrived on the "Other Side"she was placed into the deep sleep and allowed to sleep for almost 12 years. When she awoke, she was cured!
During another reading, the deceased was a person who was mentally ill and had taken his life. When he crossed over, he was allowed to sleep. When I saw him, he was sleeping and could not be aroused. I then understood what I was seeing and left him alone. Later, during a subsequent reading, he was alert and active as he was ever! He had slept for about 4 years! During the sleeping process he was totally unawares of the time that had gone by.
A word about child molesters...when you do a reading you have absolutely no control over what or who appears. Once during a reading for a lady in Florida (she wanted to know about her deceased family members). Her family had collected together in a room and I was able to meet them. I noticed that there was a deceased male who was hiding behind several members of the family. They were not protecting...they were angry at him. They shunned him. I sensed that he had molested several girls during his life time and he had been caught, accused and tried and found guilty and died while in prison. He would not talk to me. He was so ashamed of what he did...his family members would have nothing to do with him...not even in the Spirit World! He was lonely and a tortured soul. But that was of his own doing. He was in his own personal hell. He was not allowed to reincarnate. As far as I know, he is still "out there".
I must say something about emotions before we go much further...as I am doing a reading I sometimes manifest deep emotional feelings. Occasionally I weep as the loved ones make contact and communication is established. The loved ones often wish for ways to connect with their family members as much as those who were left in the living. When the connection is made I often feel a rush of emotion as the departed express their joy and relief. The best example I can give is when you see family members who have been separated for years and finally meet...they shed tears, show joy, express emotions. When I first started doing readings, Deb would come running into my office (as I would often work in chatrooms) asking what was wrong. I had to sit down with her and allow her to read some of the transcripts of the readings so that she would understand what was going on.
I have also had rushes of extreme rage also. I don't know what this was all about, but whatever it was, the spirit was angry with someone and I abruptly ended the reading. There was no further point of continuing.
Once that I feel that everything has been communicated, I will give the client one more chance to ask anything that they need to know. Sometimes the messages are sweet and sometimes they aren't. I was asked to do another crossing over type of reading for another friend and she wanted to contact her deceased Great-Grandparents. I entered into prayer and my psychic construct and I was brought to a small cozy English home...almost like a country cottage. Her Great Grandparents were there and I was greeted with smiles as they communicated their best wishes for my friend. At the end...they walked me outside and stood at their door waving small white handkerchiefs. My friend explained that whenever someone who was visiting would leave they would walk them to the outside of the house and wave with their handkerchiefs just as they had done.
I have never really had a reading where the situation had become uncontrollable. I don't want to either! But once during a reading for a lady she wanted to make connection with her Grand Mother. Grand Ma had a boy friend by the name of "Charlie" who was at times very abusive. During the reading Charlie tried to push open the door to the construct that I was in to attack Grandma. It took several other mediums who were able to "link up" and together, we threw Charlie out the door! He has never came back, even though we have held several readings with and about Grandma.
Occasionally, you as a reader might be asked to read (in an attempt to test your abilities) for either non-existent people (you will read a zero when this happens), or, you will be asked to read an unusual occurrence during some emotional turmoil. I was asked to read for a lady from Texas about her departed husband. I entered my psychic construct, saw him appear before me, and she asked what had happened just after his funeral. I saw a shadowy figure leaning over his body and remove something. I stood there and continued to watch and I saw what she had done...she had clipped some of his mustache to save in an envelope! She later confirmed that this was true and told me that this was a test.
If you are ever called or asked to do a reading that you are uncomfortable with...then STOP by all means and don't do the reading.
Once you have gleaned everything from the reading as possible, you may end the reading. There may be additional questions about what reading as far as minute details are concerned. This is as simple as simply saying another prayer asking to close the connection. Whatever works best for you is what is important. The most important thing is that you MUST break the connection or face having one of the longest connections in known history! This is what happened to me...I ended the reading, signed off the net, shut down the computer and went to bed. For most of the night I was unable to sleep as I could continue to see and feel everything that the young woman was experiencing. By the end of the night the connection was finally severed and I could get some sleep!
Most of what I have said applies to "Crossing Over" types of readings. But there are other types of readings where the information may not always apply. Lets take a look at those.
Occasionally, I am asked to do "love" interest type of readings. As far as I am concerned I really don't care to do these types because people tend to be so fickle. Plus, things can change in an instant. When doing a "crossing over" reading, I know that whoever I am trying to connect with is dead. That is like a constant, if you will. They will not change unless they reincarnate and this does occur from time to time. But with "love interest" readings you might ask me about a love interest, I might read that person and tell you that you have a chance with them. An hour later you might receive a "Dear Joe or Jane" letter breaking off the relationship. Within 24 hours you might receive another letter stating that they have changed their mind!
This is what I mean by fickle. Things can change in a love interest in mere seconds.
Psychic Spirit readings...these are different from "Crossing Over" readings in that with Spirit you are asking the Spirit that could involve not only time, but distance also. I was asked to do a reading for a lady in South Africa in a fairly crowded chat room. Suddenly I saw the shape of what appeared to be an older woman in a hospital room who was slowly dying from lung problems. I described the scene to the client who said that she did not know of anyone who looked like that. Another person in the chat room did recognize the person who I had seen on the hospital bed as being her Mother. She had been cut off by her family for many years due to some horrible circumstances that I will not divulge here. The next day, the lady from South Africa contacted me again and told me that after she had signed off she COULD remember who that person I saw was...it was a very close friend of hers whom she had not seen for years. The friend was indeed, close to death and was expected to live only a few more weeks. As a result of the friend's visit the woman regained some of her strength and she was able for some time to recover. About the other person who saw the figure as being her Mother, she had a heart attack and almost "crossed over", but since then the family has been talking and have better communication skills. They may even resolve their differences and reunite. This is what the Spirit had intended.
Sometimes I am asked by clients what may happen to them during times of severe emotional crises. I enjoy being able to help people at any time. I receive feelings of accomplishment when I see someone come through a very difficult time in their life. Perhaps they may be struggling with an internal "demon" and some counseling will help them to make a better choice for their life. One such time came when I was contact by a young man living in Quebec. Some how he had heard of me and sent me an email asking a reading. He was very despondent and was contemplating suicide. His life was totally upside down...he didn't have a job, he was trying to get out of a bad relationship, was trying to sell his house, and he was going bald. I told him during an Instant Messaging type of chat that he would be doing much better within 3 weeks. he thought I was full of Bull when I told him that he would have more control of his life within 3 weeks. Two weeks went by and he told me that he sold his house, moved from the bad relationship AND had found a job! After he stopped using steroids for physical conditioning his hair started to regrow. Since then he is slowly getting his life turned around.
"Al, (a former client) does not like (readers name) reading as much because (the reader) says (the deceased boyfriend) spends a lot of time with her do the same things he does with (client) and so (client) gets jealous about it" This is an actual email that I recently received from a former client. She was worried because a girl friend of her's (who was also a former client) boyfriend had committed suicide the year earlier. The girl friend is very jealous because the reader (a medium) claimed that the former boyfriend, was coming and "spending the night" with the reader. This is full of HOOEY! The dead can not by themselves come to a reader just to "hang out". Let alone has sex. The "life challenged" CAN come for short visits and then only from time to time. They can not stay PERMANENTLY on our plane of existence. I don't know the reason why they can't seem to stay forever BUT I do know that they can come and go. If a reader tells you that your loved one is with them 24/7 then drop them as a reader and consult someone else. There are plenty of nutty readers who will tell you that your loved one is with them just to MANIPULATE you. I can not tell you how many clients have come to me and ask about fellow readers who claim that the clients dead relatives are "visiting them" and asking for sex. This is another thing with me, so let me say this once and for all! ONCE YOU ARE DAID...there ain't no more sex! That comes straight from the Bible:
Matthew 22:30 For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven.
Mark 12:25 For when they shall rise from the dead, they neither marry, nor are given in marriage; but are as the angels which are in heaven.